Hello.

I’m not…exactly in the best of place right now. It’s been a week since I am trapped in a slump, and while I know it’s just a small hurdle, I can’t do anything until I solve it. Not my translation, not my job hunting. Is- is that weird? Like, to be so obsessed of one teeny, tiny thing, that your entire life has to be halted? I feel like I have something undiagnosed but I don’t have the resource to diagnose it (and I really don’t trust Internet Diagnosis, mainly because I am biased and partial, I am not a professional, and I do not know what I read).

I don’t have a lot of wants… well, I do have a lot of wants, but I don’t really have something I’d regret to die without possessing it, you know what I mean? I’m pretty lucky, all things considered. Got people I call family, got a roof above my head, got a body, flawed as it is. Nothing’s really permanent in this world so I’m not particular of what I have or what I leave behind, but… If there is one thing I really, really wish for… I just wish I could express myself better. Write a better sentence. Draw a better picture. Sing a better song. Every time I indulge in a creative process, I see shadows of what my works could have become, and all I can do is blame myself for being not good enough.

ABBY might take a break next week. I feel like hot tapir dung in a tropical forest. Damp and stank and covered in mold.

Mab Quote of the Week

“I don’t care if she’s an insect. She needs bigger boobas.”

Enjoy.

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