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Hmm?! Something is overflowing from the flask. Some black, fuzzy dark matter is bubbling out of the flask.

Whoa, whoa, this looks dangerous!

“Milady! Milady!”
“AaAaAHH, GOD! I thought you said it was the last time?!”
“But, but, the flask is shaking and all, it’s weird…”
“Haah. It’s only natural that the flask is shaking if you use alchemy-related magic.”

Milady said so and gave off an aura of ‘do not speak to me anymore’.

Hmm, is that so?

But this doesn’t seem to be just shaking……

It’s as if there’s an overflow of concentrated sulfuric acid that’s vaporizing ridiculously, or rather, it’s like there’s some crazy chemical reaction taking place.

But since Milady says so, maybe it’s not a big deal? I’m not sure what’s normal and what’s abnormal for me, as I’m not accustomed to magic after all.

Well, whatever, let’s continue anyway.

“Abracadabra, golden sesame!”

As soon as my random chanting was finished, a shiny gold substance was created.

N-, no way… I made gold.”

“Milady! Milady!”
“Tilea, enough of this. If you continue to interfere with my work, I’ll have you removed from the premises.”
“But, but, I seem to have made something golden…”
“It can’t be gold. How big is it?”
“Hmm, it looks like a gold bar about fifty centimeters in diameter.”
“Well, if you’ve produced gold of that size, Tilea, then you’re going to go down in history.”
“I see…”
“Even Helfferl Traunn, the leading goldsmith, could barely produce a gold coin five centimeters in diameter. And you think you, an amateur, could do it in a heartbeat?”
“Hahaha…… then, what is this thing I’ve made?”
“It’s a substance called ‘nogold’ which resembles gold. It is yellow in color and looks like gold, so it is often used for toy jewelry for children.”
“Heeh~ I didn’t know a metal like that existed.”
“Anyway, it is garbage that can be produced whenever you use alchemy magic. It is often produced by young wizards who are just starting out.”

I see, I see, then it seems that I failed to alchemize gold after all. Well, I didn’t think I could do it well from the beginning, though……

Milady’s tone sounded as if she didn’t expect me to succeed. Well, that’s frustrating. I want to at least succeed in generating lead as she said.

After that, I continued putting rocks into the flask and cast spells. But all I get is this nogold metal…

“Aa~h, this isn’t working. No matter how many times I try, all I get is nogold. Do you have any tips, Milady?”
“Just have to keep trying.”

Yeah, that’s a good point.

I really want to stay with Milady and get her advice. However, even when she’s in the next room over, I can see through her glasses that she is giving off a moody aura.

Well, no wonder. I keep interrupting her work, after all. Even then, she still answers my quests so dutifully, and I can’t help but feel like she’s spoiling me.

Well, I’m running low on material, which is the rock, so let’s make this my last. I focus my mind. Imagine. Making a gift for Timu who is working hard at the school. I’m sure Timu will be pleased. My motivation is going up.

“I shall make Gold Bar!!”

I chanted the incantation while posing like a certain anime character.

Then a tremendous chemical reaction occurred. Something like a black hole was formed in the flask.

Yup, yup, that’s a bit… terrifying.

Curious, I stuck my finger into the flask, it felt like it was trying to suck me in. Uh oh. Let’s give it space.

After that, I wait until it’s settled down.

“It-, it’s done.”

Something like shiny black obsidian had formed in the flask. Now, I’m just bragging, but calling this one of the seven hidden treasures perhaps wouldn’t be an exaggeration.

“M-, Milady, h-, help me. I think I made something extraordinary.”
“Fuuh~ I already told you not to talk to me… So, judging by how you talk, I will assume you have succeeded in transmuting something. Is it, at least, lead?”
“N-, not really lead, more like obsidian? Or maybe a new kind of metal? Either way, it’s something.”
“Obsidian? You mean to say, it is black in color?”
“Yes, it’s black. More like jet black, I think.”
“It’s probably coal.”

Coal? No, no, this can’t be coal. It looks like a first-class gemstone no matter how I look at it. Oh no. Maybe I had a talent for production work…

“Come on, Milady. Just come with me. I made something great, I say!”
“Aah, don’t make me repeat myself. I am busy! I’ll evaluate your coal or whatever later. Just give me a minute!”
“I told you, it’s not coal! It won’t take a minute!”

Impatiently, I beckon Milady from the entrance of the room, inviting her to come along. However, Milady only twitched and wouldn’t get up from her seat.

“A~h, I can’t get anywhere with this.”

I moved to her side and tried to force her to stand up.

“Ah, wait a—”
“Eh?!”

When I grabbed Milady’s hand, the ink container rolled over, spilling ink all over the stack of papers.

“U-, umm, e-, ermm, I-, I don’t mean any ill will. Ehehe, I just got too excited…”
“Yes, yes, I can see it. After all, you would be very sorry if you had done it out of ill will. Thank you, my effort for the last six hours is now out the window.”
“Hawawawa, is-, is that so? Don’t you have a USB dr— a backup… do you?”
“Why, of course. If only you knew such a convenient magic spell like Back Up, you could have taught me about it. After all, now I must do everything all over again.”
“Ahaha, I’m really sorry. How should I say this… umm, ah, is there anything I can do to help? I’ll do my best.”

I rolled up my arms, trying to appeal.

“Will you now? If so, please take your leave so I can do my job comfortably.”
“Eh, no, no, that’s not what helping is. Really, it’s my fault too.”
“Please leave, before I use force.”
“Y-, yes, I’m ssooorrryyy——!”

I left the office as fast as I could.

A~ah, that was dangerous. Milady was totally about to snap.

Haah~ I messed up……

I’m prone to getting carried away, that’s my fault. If you think about it, there is no way I could have made something great. I must have made something like nogold again. And yet I got excited and interfered with Milady’s work. I feel really bad about that. I’ll make it up to her some other time.

But still, what should I do with this…?

It’s the first alchemical substance I’ve made. I can’t just throw it away…

That’s right! Let’s just say it’s a war fund for the Evil God’s Army. I’ve always been on edge because everyone is playing with the Orty’s family treasures. I was afraid Orty’s dad would be angry with me someday anyway. This nogold I made should be enough for playing with the Evil Gods Army.

Translator’s Note:

So many pop culture references that are lost to me…