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This chapter has been replaced with a new translation on [2024-07-16]. Comments may refer to the old translation.

It had been four days since I came back from the school trip.

He had left me behind and went to school by himself. Was he that excited about the new Dragonar Story game? That he’d forget about me…?

I had been friends with him since we were little kids.

Hm~, mom told me that I had been two years old, when he and his family moved in next to us, didn’t she? We’ve been friends since then… I guess?

Oh, but don’t rashly assume that we’re a couple, since we’re childhood friends, alright? We might be more than friends, but not in a relationship. Well, if we really were, it’d be a dream come true, but… It’s merely unrequited love on my side.

His name was… Joujou Ayumu.

Ayumu absolutely loved RPGs. Enough to leave his long-time friend behind. I guess that’s why he wasn’t interested in me¹, at least as a romantic partner? Definitely…

Full of resentment after being left behind, I sent him a message via the phone app.

«Hey! Why did you leave without me?!» I typed.

If he doesn’t notice it, I’ll have the “right to have him do anything for me”. Then… I could even ask him to go on a date…

Oh, incidentally, when he left me behind on another occasion and also didn’t react to the phone app, I made him buy me an energy drink. One for 200 yen².

«Oh, sorry. My bad m(_ _)m.»
Aw, he immediately replied. I guess that 200-yen energy drink was effective, after all…?

It wasn’t even that he had no money, he was simply a cheapskate. Unless it was for something he thought he absolutely needed, he wouldn’t spend any. Still, on my birthday, he got me something rather expensive, which was probably hard to afford as a student. I guess that was because he didn’t want me to complain about the present.

For now, I sent him an immediate reply.
«As a punishment, I’ll take something from your lunch box!»

Well, this is all I can ask of him, I guess. Though he’s never happy, when I snatch any of his side dishes.

…Oh, come to think of it, why and when did I start having feelings for Ayumu again…?

It was on a day when we were in sixth grade, when a pane of glass shattered and the pieces rained down on us, and he shielded me… I think that was the time? No, that’s not right. It was even before that, I guess…

I’ve been walking while thinking about this stuff, so I should reach the school soon, right?
…Huh? What’s with the crowd of people on the road to my school?

Ugh, I don’t want to push through that crowd. Still, I need to reach the other side, or I can’t get to the school…

Further ahead on the road, a car with white and red lights on it came driving.
…An ambulance? Huh, did someone collapse? I wonder what in the world happened.

I’ll try asking someone in that crowd.

“Erm… What happened here…?”
“Hm, oh, for some reason, a flowerpot³ dropped from that high rise building,” the middle-aged man I had asked replied. “And… erm… a boy… I think he might be a student at that high school over there, but… Oh, judging from your school uniform, you are too… yeah. The boy was below the flowerpot.”
“I… see…”

Huh? What is this? Why would I…

Somehow, I had a bad premonition, like I had never felt before. My chest seemed to tighten.

C-Come to think of it, he left earlier than me today, didn’t he? Around 10 minutes earlier? Ha… ha-ha, impossible, something like that wouldn’t happen to Ayumu…

Besides, why didn’t he send me a reply regarding that side dish? Even though, whenever I told him that I’d take one of his side dishes, he’d always complain in some manner…?

N-No… It’s just me. That I’d consider such a thing… Right, I better make sure that the high school student who was hit by the flowerpot isn’t him.

I pushed my way through the crowd to catch a glimpse of the scene. On the floor, I could see the strap I had given him for his birthday last year, attached to his school bag⁴. Finally… The boy I had feelings for was lying there, covered in blood.

It’s Ayumu…

Oh, just now, someone got out of the ambulance and is taking his pulse… Right. Just because he’s been hit by a flowerpot doesn’t mean he’s going to…
THE PERSON. TAKING HIS PULSE. SHOOK THEIR HEAD⁵.

“A… yu… mu?” I mumbled involuntarily in a strange voice.
But I didn’t even notice I had said something. Pushing through the crowd, I rushed to Ayumu’s side.

Blood flew from his head.
Endlessly.
It was flowing even now.

I screamed.
In despair.

“Ayu… mu… Ayu… mu… please, come on, please answer! Please say something! I beg you! Hey~! Hey~! Hey… Hey? Ayumu? Wake up, Ayumu, AyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumuAyumu~…

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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah⁶…”

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I wonder, how long had it been since then? Since the one I love died. Today, I went to school for the first time since then.

Every day, I had cried and cried, all day and night long. I also was barely able to swallow any food.
Today, I reluctantly went to school. If I cried all the time, he probably wouldn’t find peace of mind.

There was a lot that I regretted.

If only I also had left 10 minutes earlier on that day. If only I had been gentler.
If only I had confessed to him during that school trip. No, I should’ve done so earlier. If only I had… told him that I liked him… that I loved him…!!

Yeah… it’s useless. I don’t want to cause any more worry to the people around me. I’m not the only one who is sad.

Uncle, aunty, and his little brother, Kanata. Mom, Dad, and my little sister, Sakura. His best friend, Shuu, and all our classmates. They all are sad.

Even if I do nothing but brood about it, nothing will come of it. I couldn’t face him like that. But, still, this is all I can do in the end…

I opened the usual phone app and typed a message into my personal chat with him, below the one about the side dish.

«I always, always loved you. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I love you.»
…I pressed the “send” button.

Even though the one I sent it to no longer exists. He will see it. I feel like he will.

Only. I shouldn’t have walked while looking at my phone. Normally, I might have dodged it by a hair’s breadth. But my mind was occupied with thinking about him and the smartphone in front of my eyes.

…So, I didn’t notice the large truck driving up onto the sidewalk.

*Screech~~*!!
*Bonk*…

These were the last sounds I heard in this world.

1. The original says, “I guess that’s why I am not interested in him, at least as a romantic partner?”. I assume that’s a typo since that wouldn’t make sense in context.
2. I’d like to go to this parallel world where energy drinks are this cheap.
3. It’s “flower vase” in the original. I chose flowerpot for consistency’s sake, since that was what Jizou told Alim in chapter 2.
4. The original is サブバック (“sub bag”, “reserve bag”). Maybe it’s an error or maybe it means that he has several school bags.
5. All the grammar and parts in that sentence that usually are in hiragana are in katakana instead, which I tried to reflect by putting it all in caps.
6. You’d think she’d run out of air at some point.