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It felt like time had stopped, the surroundings turned eerily quiet as all the dragons looked at me with eyes filled with pity.

Sensing the reaction around me, I looked all over the place in a state of panic. Filled with uncertainties, I asked with a slightly shaky voice, “D- don’t tell me… being unable to recognize the dragon language is an even bigger flaw than being unable to transform? Am I… no longer qualified to be the princess…?”

The atmosphere froze for a few seconds. Then, like a paused CD player that had just been suddenly resumed, the dragons roared like it was the end of the world.

“T- that’s… so pitiful… Not only is the princess unable to transform into a dragon, but she also cannot understand the dragon language at birth…”

“I know right!”

“Just what did our princess do to deserve this kind of treatment? Just look at her, she’s such a cute little thing…”

“Could it be that the Heavens are jealous of the princess’ cuteness and put her through this tribulation on purpose? Gods above Heaven! Why must the princess experience all these misfortunes?!”

Is being unable to understand dragon language really that bad compared to dragon transformation? There… should be a solution to this right? If there isn’t, then doesn’t that mean the great ancestor’s blood essence is wasted on me? Will my revenge plan come to a premature end before I can even start its execution?

When I thought of it like that, even I felt pity for myself.

“It’s so pitiful that the princess has to relearn the dragon language from scratch. Just imagine the difficulty in learning the language.”

Eh? Something feels a little off?

“That’s right… I needed two hundred years to learn how to roast meat. Doesn’t that mean the princess will need at least twenty thousand years to relearn dragon language? Oof… the princess’s youth would be wasted on this alone.”

Twenty thousand years, the dragons sure have a long adolescence period… Pooh! Now’s not the time to make a retort. After understanding what the dragons were saying, I came to realize that…

You guys felt that I am pitiful, not because my inability to understand dragon language is a fatal flaw, but that I have to relearn it from scratch?!

What’s with that pity then? It feels like, students using cheat sheets to pass the exam are pitying the one who couldn’t cheat and failed? Did you guys know your great ancestor was a top student who obtained a doctoral degree in just a few years? Did you guys not inherit a shred of those genes? Has the whole race gone through some kind of mutation?

At this time, my mother suddenly placed her hands on my shoulders and assured me with a soothing tone, “Don’t worry, I will definitely invite the greatest teacher for you. I guarantee to shorten your study period to less than ten thousand years. Then you won’t have to suffer for long.”

Why are you also like this, mother? Could it be that you have personally experienced the difficulties of studying and suffered greatly in this field?

Oi oi, stop looking so serious y’all! Don’t put on a face as though you are about to face your greatest enemy. Your obvious reaction would only announce to the whole world the uneducated nature of our entire race.

Besides, how can you guys be so sure that I am a stupid ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— like you all, who would need two hundred years to learn how to roast meat? Don’t joke with me! I am going to use my ability to prove that I am not as brainless as the lot of you. I will only use two to three years to learn all there is to know about dragon language and use my position as a top student to laugh at all of you.

“Who can teach my dear daughter?” Mother turned towards the other dragons and asked.

After a moment of silence, the dragons again started their noisy discussion.

“W- who indeed?”

“I don’t know, how are we supposed to teach?”

“I have no idea. Eh? Didn’t you study at a human nation before, why don’t you give it a try?”

“Idiot! Being a student and a teacher are two different things. Besides, I only became a student to woo the teacher, I never once took my lessons in earnest.”

“All of you be quiet!”

As the prime minister, Akarin, took a step forward; with his long years of authority, the noisy crowd quietened down in an instant. It was obvious as he had been in this seat for a really long time. If you ignored his loyal dog attitude, he looked quite reliable. After once glancing over all the dragons, he said:

“We must first find a teacher for the princess, is there anyone among you who has learned how to teach?”

“……” All the dragons turned silent.

“None? Then is there anyone with plenty of experience in children’s education?”

“……” They all remained as silent as before.

Akarin turned his head sideways and asked a black dragon, “Aoken, didn’t you always brag about how you managed to discipline your child? How about you…”

Upon closer inspection, I realized that Aoken was the same fella who directed the spotlight on me during the birth festival. Apparently, he was shocked at Akarin’s sudden mention of him. His big head shook quickly as he hastily tried to explain, “No way! I normally hit my child with a ten meters club when he’s disobedient, if I do that to the princess… I…”

“If you dare to hit my daughter, I will stick that ten meters club into your ⓑⓔⓔⓟ,” mother cut him off with a smile.

Aoken was so frightened, he promptly pulled back and said in a self-mocking tone, “Don’t worry my queen, I am not a teacher material, that club of mine will stay one kilometer away from the princess.”

“Is there no one among dragons who knows how to teach?” Akarin asked again with a frown. All he received as an answer was silence.

Mother gave off a chilly aura and asked impatiently, “You guys have lived for so long, and yet none of you have learned anything related to teaching? Did you spend your ten thousand years of lifespan living like a dog?”

“My queen, I learned how to cook tender meat with a crispy exterior.”

“What I learned is how to become a great poet.”

“My profession is a musician.”

“And I am…”

Numerous dragons began to reveal what they have learned over the past years, but none of them had any knowledge related to teaching.

At this time, the sculptor appeared out of nowhere to add fuel to the fire, “I remember Akarin used to teach some young dragons the human language before he becomes the prime minister. He should have some experience in that field.”

“You old fool!” Akarin pointed at the sculptor in a fit of rage, “You just wait.”

“Hm?” Mother narrowed her eyes as she stared at Akarin sharply. Her entire body was giving off a dangerous aura.

“Ah~ please let me explain, my queen. That was a really long time ago. I have already long forgotten how to teach.”

Mother’s glare became increasingly dangerous…

Akarin used his claws to wipe the cold sweat on his forehead, but the more he tried to calm down, the more he sweated. Even from this distance, I could clearly see the washbowl-sized sweats on his scaly forehead.

“That’s right!” Akarin suddenly shouted, “I just remembered. I know where to find the best candidate for teaching!”

“Who is it?”

Akarin answered with a slight smile, “A professional teacher from human nation..”¹

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“Go away!” I spoke out my true feeling at that dragon who was begging for punishment.

“Ooooh! As expected of the princess, even her angry voice sounded so sweet and touching. Ahn~ I can’t stand it anymore, this feels just like that time I, Aisha, had transformed into a human and walked on the street butt-naked. It feels just as stimulating as being pointed out by others under their watchful gaze~” The huge dragon squirmed its body and let out excited voices like its G-spot had been hit during ⓑⓔⓔⓟ ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—.¹

Oi oi, don’t tell me you really went and did that? Running around naked on the street is against the law y’know? You will be detained by the police officer and criticized by those aunties on the street y’know?

Okay, never mind, that’ll only make you more excited I suppose…

“Come! Abuse me with your words again Your Highness! Use your most malicious words to spite me, it would be even better if you can step on my head while calling me a swine~”²

Aisha squirmed her body more intensely.

Who would do something like that! There’s no way I’m going to step on your perverted head and do something that perverted! I would be infected by your perverted behavior!

I profoundly understood at this moment, to handle a weirdo like this, you couldn’t do it the normal way, you had to go against their expectations…

“Cough, cough,” I cleared my throat and said with the loftiness of a princess, “As a princess, how can I do that sort of thing? You are my lovely kin, no matter how perverted you are, I will not criticize you at all.”

Upon hearing my words, Aisha stopped squirming and became as stiff as a deep-fried prawn in the frying pan. The flush on her face also gradually vanished (Don’t ask me how I can tell, I just can).

After that, she made a tearful expression and said, “How cruel, how can you be this cruel to me, princess? Boo hoo hoo… how am I supposed to live from now on~”

As she finished speaking, Aisha turned around and flew away without even looking back.

I looked at Aisha disappearing into the flock of dragons and secretly wondered if I was really that cruel.

… As if! To be that broken-hearted just from hearing kind words being spoken to you, I bet you have a mental disorder.

If this keeps up, I wonder what would happen when you meet your true love in the future? Will you die from shock just from hearing the three words, “I love you”?

Nay, only an S would fall in love with an M, I wonder if there are any among this group of weirdo.

At this time, mother patted my head and said, “Don’t be scared, Aisha is like that. Next time, just hang her over the Skyfire Lava for a hundred years and she’ll be pacified.”

“……” The biggest S of the dragons is just right beside me!!

So… so scary, would she also be that merciless against me? ……but now that I thought about those one hundred ten thousand clothes… it felt like the deed had already been done……

“Oh right, you looked a little odd just now, did something happen?” Mother suddenly asked.

“R- really?” I answered with a forced smile.

“Of course,” Mother narrowed her eyes as she approached. She pointed at the broken sword in my hand, “You didn’t have this just now.”

“……”

After thinking for a bit, I felt that it would be better to let her know everything. After all, the one before me was my mother, the person whom I trust the most after coming to this world. She definitely wouldn’t do harm to me.

That’s what my intuition told me, and my intuition had never been wrong.

Besides, I bet mother had a solution regarding my lack of knowledge in dragon language.

As such, I told mother everything, from how my soul was sucked into the Dragon Monument, how I met the great ancestor, and how the great ancestor had gifted me the broken sword as well as a drop of blood.

After hearing my stories, mother opened her eyes wide and asked in surprise, “You are saying you met the will left behind by the Origin Dragon, and that he has gifted you a divine weapon and a drop of blood essence containing the progenitor’s magical foundation?”

I nodded my head and pointed at the true name that was just engraved on the dragon monument, “That name is granted to me by the great ancestor.”

Only now did mother turn her head to look at my true name, “Chaos Dragon, Artemis Niger Lilith… Artemis Niger… Even I didn’t manage to receive the full family name, and yet you did…”

Mother turned around and suddenly executed her ultimate killing move again, trapping me in between the soft and suffocating hell.

“I really am so happy. When I found that you couldn’t transform into a dragon, I was so worried if there’s a problem with your bloodline and fear that you might be rejected by the Dragon Monument. But now, not only have you been acknowledged by the Dragon Monument, you have even received the favor of the great ancestor… I’m really so glad…” Mother’s voice carried a sobbing tone.

I see… so it was a lie when you told me there wouldn’t be any problem… I even went up there so full of confidence, wouldn’t that have been very embarrassing if I failed?

“How admirable of the princess, not only have you received a true name, you even received the great ancestor’s inheritance and divine weapon! Looks like your rise to power is already unstoppable!”

“C- Chaos Dragon… what a mighty title. Looks like the princess’ name will resound through the End of the World…”

“All hail the princess!”

“Princess, I want to give birth to your monkey!”

“Ⓕⓤⓒⓚ off! Aren’t you male to begin with?!”

“Heh-heh, you speak as though only females like you can give birth to the princess’ child.”

“……”

Let’s just ignore those idiots. I struggled to get free from mother’s hug and said, “It’s true that I have received the great ancestor’s blood essence, but I have run into a problem?”

“What problem?” Mother looked at me with a smile. Her face said it all, that she would solve my problem, no matter what it was.

“That’s, um…” I scratched my head and after hesitating for a long time, I finally summoned my courage and said, “I don’t understand dragon language, is there still any hope for me?”

“Pfff… and here I wondered what is it, it’s just a mere dragon lan…” Mother’s smile froze little by little.

The noisy dragons in the surroundings suddenly stopped making noise, as though they had just heard something shocking…

It was as if they received a shock much greater than the time they found that I couldn’t transform.

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This moment felt like that time when I was still a thirteen years old homeless kid. When we were wandering about aimlessly, we eventually ended up in a small temple in the middle of nowhere. We turned that temple into an interim base of operations for a period of time.

One bright afternoon, I was roused from my afternoon nap by a rumbling sound. In a daze, I opened my eyes to find the old gentleman flipping the worn-out pages of an old book while doing some kind of intense exercise with his other hand under the rag. He wore a really obsessed expression which I had never seen before.¹

‘What are you doing…’ the me at that time asked.

Perhaps the old gentleman was too focused on reading, he was startled by me. His complexion changed from blue to red, then from red to blue. It seemed like something that meant a lot to him had been destroyed by me.²

He only snapped back to reality after three whole minutes.

‘I was studying,’ he used the right hand which was hidden under the rag to adjust his non-existent glasses.

‘Is there any point for a wanderer like you to study?’ I asked.

The old gentleman squinted his eyes, which seemed to reflect light.

‘Even if you’re a wanderer, you still cannot be illiterate. Otherwise, how can you tell if the food has expired, or judge the size of a woman’s breasts from the bra they discarded?’

‘Oh,’ the young me replied with a lack of interest and went back to sleep.

If I could return to that time, I definitely would have pulled the rags covering his body and knelt in front of him to make him teach me the real meaning of studying.

Because only now had I realized just how important a lesson was he trying to impart upon me at that time: An illiterate… has no human rights.

The great ancestor’s blood contained his lifetime magical knowledge. As long as I could master them and some more, I would be able to sweep across this world, do whatever I pleased, start a harem, and step into the summit! Even the dream of ascending to godhood to reconstruct my body, press my OO against the two retarded goddesses and had them reincarnate as lizards wouldn’t be too far off.³

However… I couldn’t even recognize a single character that emerged in my brain…

This was just like spending ten dollars to buy a martial arts book, only to find yourself unable to go to school to study because you had spent the money on the martial arts book. You couldn’t read a single letter in the book, but when you turned around to ask the old man to refund the money so you could go to school and buy the book again at a later date, he was already gone without a trace.

It’s a path full of despair…

Damn it, don’t tell me I didn’t even earn a single cent from this?

I was so angry that I reflexively punched the Dragon Monument, only then did I realize my hand was holding onto a twenty centimeters long divine weapon.

Although three-fourths of the sword didn’t possess any destructive power and only one-fourth was capable of harming others… at the very least, I still managed to earn a single cent from this trip right? Even if that cent was already broken in half…

Just like all the other protagonists out there, if they encountered some old masters or ancestors, and whatnot, they would at least obtain a divine weapon and secret techniques to boost their own cheat level… I also feel that I have received a considerable benefit from this, Or at least… I have gained a cool name, didn’t I?

That’s right, my true name is so cool, it’s called Chaos Dragon, Arte… what was it again?

I seem to recall the last name being Lilith, but the middle… i- it’s not like I’ve forgotten my name, it’s just that my soul has just returned to my body so my brain is a little short-circuit. That’s right… that was it… As a ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— in my previous life, now the princess of dragons, there’s no way I can forget my name at the drop of a hat… Don’t kid with me, you should know that, even with numerous true names in my previous life…

…it seems that I also couldn’t remember a single one.

It looks like I’m done for… not only will I become the most uncivilized dragon, but I will also become the dumbest dragon in history…

I recalled those group of fools… I really didn’t want to admit that I was dumber than them…

“My dearest daughter, did something happen?” A gentle voice came from my side. When I turned towards the voice, I found my mother, who appeared beside me unknowingly, with a compassionate smile on her face. The other dragons also began to soar into the sky, flapping their uselessly big wings as they flocked around the Dragon Monument.

That warm feeling involuntarily occupied my heart again.

“It’s nothing,” I answered while shaking my head, a clear yet childish voice left my mouth unhindered.

Even I was shocked by my own voice, my hand unconsciously touched my lips to make sure the voice had indeed come out from my own mouth.

I can speak?

Mother was also surprised, but she rebooted in two seconds later and pulled me into her embrace, “Kya~ my dear daughter can speak already? Mommy is so happy.”

My head was buried deeper into her breasts than I ever had. All I felt was my face being covered in a huge and damp cotton. Although it was a very splendid feeling, I felt that I wouldn’t be able to last for three seconds in there.

“…Ca… ..the… (Can’t breathe)”

“Dear daughter, what are you saying?” mother tilted her head and asked.

I used my hand to push as hard as I could and finally opened a small gap between my face and the breast.

“I said I can’t breathe!”

“Oh my, would you just look at how excited I was. My bad~ don’t be angry, it’s mommy’s fault~” Mother rubbed my head while she apologized, she didn’t look apologetic at all.

“Wow! You can speak already your highness?” Akarin, who was flying around the Dragon Monument, suddenly poked his huge head over and asked.

I nodded.

Akarin’s dragon eye opened wide and said with a slight variation in pitch, “A- as expected of the princess! You can already speak after such a short time.”

After that, he looked up and shouted in a loud voice audible even tens of miles away, “The princess can speak!!!!”

Upon hearing that, the surrounding dragons crowded the area like vultures that caught the scent of rotting flesh.

Thousand-odd dragons surrounded me and blocked any lights from passing through. It was so crowded that some dragons couldn’t flap their wings, so they simply folded it and levitated in the sky.

So those pairs of wings were really there for show only.

“Princess, you really can speak already?”

“As expected of your highness, it has only been half a day. Tell you what, that little brat in my house took thirty years to learn how to speak.”

“That’s because your child is stupid, how can he be compared to our princess? Come, your highness, call me uncle…”

“You fool, how can you make the princess call you uncle? How cheeky. Your Highness~ you can call this humble servant a stupid dog~”

Hey hey, what’s with this celebratory feeling just from me being able to speak? And that one who asked me to call you a dog, you are an absolute M⁴ aren’t you? If the great ancestor knew there’s such a perverted M among the dragons, let’s see how he deals with you. Even I would feel embarrassed to let others know.

“Ah, why are you not calling, your highness~ Just once is good enough, let me experience the thrill of being insulted by the cute little princess’ poisonous tongue.”

Actually, let’s not wait for the great ancestor, I will personally kill you now!!

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I looked at the blood essence in front of me, then I showed disdain toward the innocent-looking eyes of the great ancestor. Did he think I would be fooled again after being scammed twice?

Hahaha, too naive, did you think I was that kind of trashy light novel protagonists who would gamble with my luck whenever I run into an opportunity? I wouldn’t even spare a glance at those kinds of trashy protagonists who always relied on plot armor to do whatever they pleased. Just who was I? A great ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— in my previous life, now the princess of the dragons! Though that may be the case, I had never fallen off a cliff, nor had I ever been pushed for a marriage interview, and I even doubted my status as the protagonist three minutes ago.

But there’s a proverb that says: A minor character who didn’t want to be a protagonist is just a small fry. Even if I am merely a minor character in the first thirty chapters of the series, I still need to make a choice that a protagonist would choose!

And that’s…

“How do you use this thing?” Cough cough, don’t look at a young girl with that kind of expression will ya? This little girl can feel shy too~

“Just swallow it.”

S- swallow it? What kind of joke is that? If it’s just normal blood, fine, but this drop of blood clearly has some foreign substance in it! Just look… doesn’t that black spot look like a little insect squirming incessantly? So scary… Even if I had eaten the most revolting food in my previous world, I still felt disgusted at this drop of blood.

“Isn’t there a less disgusting method? Other people can fuse with the blood essence with just a touch, but why do I need to swallow it?”

“With a touch? Thou are saying to conduct the fusion by directly passing the blood into thee system? That method will show the desired effect very quickly, but are thou not concerned about the compatibility of our blood type?” The great ancestor showed a somewhat puzzled face.

I beg you to stop flaunting your biology knowledge! I already know you are multi-talented and even got a doctorate degree. How can my grade three elementary school standard be compared to yours? Just call me ignorant and inexperienced alright? I will just swallow it okay?

In order to stop the great ancestor from using scientific knowledge to brainwash me, I suppressed my disgust and swallowed the blood essence with my eyes shut.

“Eh? It doesn’t seem like anything’s changed?” I patted my body here and there to check my current condition, but I found that nothing was happening?

Was that drop of blood really expired?

“Idiot,” the great ancestor once again confirmed my low IQ, “You are now in a spiritual body, for any physical changes to occur, you got to at least wait till you return to your body.”

“Is that so,” I almost forgot I was currently in a spiritual body… eh? Wait a moment, why was I able to swallow the blood essence with my spiritual body? No matter how you put it, wasn’t blood a physical substance?

However, the great ancestor didn’t give me a chance to ask any more questions. He lifted his huge head by twenty degrees to regain his dignity (show off), and said indifferently, “Now that you have received all my inheritance, it is time for you to leave. Remember, the dragon language is the foundation of the dragon’s magic. Even though we are born with an innate knowledge of dragon language, you still need to practice diligently. Otherwise, your magic firepower and accuracy would take a sharp drop.”

The golden light in the surroundings is getting stronger, I could feel my body being repelled by this space.

Excuse me, great ancestor, didn’t you forget something important? I didn’t come here to listen to you flaunting!

“Great ancestor… didn’t you… forget… to grant me… a true name?” Just moments before I was completely ejected from this space, I shouted towards the great ancestor.

“,,,,,,” The surrounding gold light started to get dimmer, and the repelling force also gradually disappeared.

This old man has really forgotten?!

The great ancestor let out two dry coughs as he refocused on me. His golden pupils gave off intimidating lights.

“All things exist with a cause, whereas there are ends to every beginning. Since you have accepted my inheritance, then you must accept my fate. I am known as the Origin Dragon, Aterlieum Niger Gerald.

From henceforth, you shall accept my family name and restore my glory.

Your true name: Chaos Dragon — Artemis Niger Lilith.”¹

With that last word from the great ancestor, the gold light gradually brightened up again. The repelling force also became stronger along with the growing intensity of the light. My consciousness became fuzzier over time, I couldn’t register anything the great ancestor said, all except for my true name that was engraved deeply in my mind.

Chaos Dragon… hehehe… that sounds so cool…

………

“Ooh!” I woke up with a start and found that I was still floating in the sky with one hand placed on the Dragon Monument. It seemed like I had been maintaining this posture all the while my spiritual body was sucked into the monument.

“!!! So hot!” All of a sudden, I could feel my heart setting ablaze.

Thump-thump thump-thump! In just a fraction of a second, my heart beats so much faster compared to when I was just born. The blood was flowing through my veins like a surging river.

Though it was faint, an old image surfaced in my vision.

Sitting on top of an ancient-looking throne was a huge golden dragon. The dragon slightly opened its eyes and looked straight at me. It felt as though it was gazing at me from a different cosmos through a multitude of dimensions.

“Thou… are the envoy of the end.”

Countless red characters appeared in thin air along with those words as they flowed into my brain.

At this time, the Dragon Monument suddenly shone brightly and brought my attention back from the image. Red characters moved about within the Dragon Monument and eventually stopped at the top-most position.

I wiped the sweat on my forehead and gradually returned my pulse to normal. It seemed like the great ancestor didn’t scam me this time. With so much power granted upon me by the blood essence, it must be the real deal.

It’s just that when I looked at the true name that was just engraved on the Dragon Monument…

…Why can’t I recognize those characters?

Moreover, the characters that appeared in my brain were most certainly the same as those characters on the Dragon Monument. They ought to be the so-called dragon language… but why can’t I recognize those characters?

Didn’t he say dragons are born with an innate knowledge of dragon language?

My face suddenly paled and felt that I have indeed been scammed!

Not by the great ancestor, but by the two retarded goddesses! They gave me the ability to understand the language of this world, but they forgot to install the translation software!!

Without translation software, how am I supposed to learn dragon magic? Just randomly shouting Shalalala²?

I looked at the tadpole-sized characters with dry tears… could this be what they mean by the shortcoming of being illiterate?

As expected, I really am not main character materials… because there is no ⓕⓤⓒⓚⓘⓝⓖ way for the main character to be illiterate!!

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In this world, there were always some people like that, a salted fish who could only wait for death’s embrace. But due to some reason, they would be summoned to a parallel world, meet a beautiful goddess who would say this with a beaming smile, “Young hero~ I’ve finally met you. Your mission is to save this world. Come— and receive your cheats. It will instantly raise your level to 9999 and overtake the level 9000 final BOSS. Go— go and slay the Demon King. May my blessing be with you~”

Then after arriving in the otherworld, the most important person in the village would come up to him and say, “This is the greatest sword my village has to offer. You can kill with Demon King with this sword in one swing, but only a real hero can wield it. My intuition tells me that you are the one. Come, draw the sword and defeat the Demon King. I believe you can do it.”

And before departure, his childhood sweetheart would see him off with tears, “This is a safety charm I personally requested for you. It has a Damage Nullification self-BUFF. You must take good care of it. I will definitely wait for you to return, that’s why you must stay alive.”

Then the king would hold a grand feast for him and said with a benevolent smile, “I have decided to betroth my only daughter to you. What, you already have a fiancee? That’s not a problem, which hero doesn’t have at least three wives and four concubines? I even thought there are not enough. Oh, that chancellor over there. That’s right, I’m talking to you. I hear your daughter is devastatingly beautiful, and you have seventeen daughters at that, how about betrothing them to the hero together with mine?”

And finally, after a series of hardships and dangerous adventures, he finally arrived before the Demon King, only to find that the Demon King was actually a big-breasted cutie. Therefore, he would first carry out lots of unspeakable S&M training on the Demon King before proceeding to brutally brainwash her, thus, adding her to the hero’s harem.

In the end, he would return to his village with innumerable harem members and live happily ever after.

At this point, I believe you guys should have already guessed the identity of that man…

That’s right, they are the legendary main characters!

Me, Kaoru, the ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— of ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— in my previous life. I have this world’s most ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— and ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—. Although I died from saving my beloved woman, I have successfully reincarnated. According to the pattern, I should have been the so-called main character.

But I recently realized, I might be a fake main character…

First, the goddesses I met were not affable and gentle at all. They were, in fact, two-faced phony, even their breasts were fake. They never gave me any incredible cheats, but took away ten of mine instead. They even took away my rights to immerse in my ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—.

I didn’t have any childhood sweetheart either. After I was born, all I found was a daughter-con of a mother who would challenge my bottom line with embarrassing clothes and a group of foolish clansmen who only knew how to show off.

And now, it was supposed to be an event where the most senior member of the village giving me the best sword in the village, but this so-called sword was only five freaking centimeters long…

It’s only five centimeters long y’know?! Even a potato peeler was longer than this.

The great ancestor said I will be able to restore this divine weapon to its former glory so long as I can find the fragments, but I have finally understood after being scammed for so many times, it won’t be that easy…

As expected…

Not only does he not have a specific location in mind, but there is also no sensor that would go beep beep beep when you get close to the fragments…

And the most frightening thing is that the sword has shattered into hundreds of fragments. Even the Dragon Balls only have seven pieces y’know?!¹

Just which ⓑⓐⓢⓣⓐⓡⓓ did you fight for seven days and seven nights straight?

“You moron, with thy body size, just a single fragment is enough,” the great ancestor expressed genuine disdain at my way of thinking.

That’s right! If you divide the remaining 199.95 meters by a hundred, each fragment would have an average length of two meters. With my 1.4 meters loli build, it would be enough even with just a meter.

But my intuition was telling me, it’s, not, that, easy!

The great ancestor must be concealing something very important from me.

He has a look as innocent as that of an alpaca in the middle of ⓡⓐⓟⓘⓝⓖ me, but if you tell me that there were no strings attached when someone as egotistical as him started to act innocent, I wouldn’t even believe it!

Seeing that I was looking at him doubtfully, the great ancestor coughed awkwardly and said indifferent, “Let us put that trivial matter to the side. We still haven’t got right down to business.”

“What business?”

“I will now present thou with my true inheritance.”

“T- true inheritance?” Don’t tell me it was that kind of inheritance you got from an old master who suddenly came up to you and said: Little guy, I see that you are quite tough. You must be a martial genius who only appears once in a hundred years. Our meeting must be fate. Just give me ten dollars and I will impart to you my lifetime’s techniques.

“That’s right,” the great ancestor suddenly opened his mouth, and a red liquid came out from the wide-open mouth. “This is the blood essence of my main body. All my lifetime’s magic knowledge has been contained in this. Not only that, but it can also purify your blood, increasing the purity and bringing you one step closer to the origin.”

“Is that so?” I looked at the dark red blood in front of me. Let’s put aside where he scooped out that drop of blood for now, this somehow felt fishy. Was dragon blood supposed to look like this? I seemed to recall mother’s blood being bright red. Could this blood essence be… long past its expiration date?

“Once the blood essence blends into thy system, thou shall be one step closer to thee dream of obtaining big breasts.”

It was unnatural, way to unnatural, the great ancestor seemed to be very concerned in regards to whether the blood essence would blend into my system or not. He was so concerned that if I refused, he might try to use a more forceful method.

‘Don’t tell me…’ I stared at the great ancestors with eyes as sharp as the knife, “Great ancestor, you…”

The great ancestor’s face gradually became more pensive.

“…aren’t trying to scam me again right?”

The great ancestor looked distracted for a moment, probably because I had hit the mark. Then he said with an expression as innocent as that of an alpaca, “How can that be? You are my cute little descendant~ How can I scam my own descendant?”

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When I looked at the five-centimeter long broken blade in my hand, I suddenly felt as though I was being ⓡⓐⓟⓔⓓ, nonono, it’s more like I am currently being ⓡⓐⓟⓔⓓ.

But I thought of something else straight away. Just who was my ancestor? He was but an existence even gods wouldn’t dare to provoke. Was he trying to fool me with this ‘toy’? Could it be that the appearance of the broken sword was meant to confuse the enemy and it was actually a magic sword that would extend to twenty meters when infused with mana?

That’s right, that must be it! If the great ancestor scam a younger generation like me, then his prestige would be totally ruined no matter how hard he tried to maintain it.

Just in case, I still tried asking a little.

“Um… great ancestor, may I ask you a question?”

“Thou may ask.”

I positioned the broken sword in front of the great ancestor and asked with slight hope, “Why is this divine weapon only five centimeters long?”

The great ancestor looked at the broken sword with a serious expression. After a moment of recollection, he looked like he had recalled something very important as he confessed, “Oh~ I almost forgot. This sword was broken in a battle with my old nemesis… Now that I think about it, that guy was really strong. He actually fought with me seven days, seven nights straight. Of course, he was still defeated by me in the end. But for someone to last that long against me, there are no more than twenty such individuals even if you search through tens of thousands of worlds. When you mentioned him, you can’t help but think about that other nemesis of mine, he was also…”

I suddenly felt like, instead of simply getting ⓡⓐⓟⓔⓓ, I was getting ⓖ@ⓝⓖⓑ@ⓝⓖⓔⓓ by a group of alpacas¹ instead. Those alpacas were just like poodle dogs in heat, they looked so innocent on the outside, but they were doing unspeakable things to my weak and immature body.

I’m gonna ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— you and ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—, you actually forgot about something that important, you mother ⓕⓤⓒⓚⓔⓡ.

And who cares about your ⓑⓔⓔⓟⓘⓝⓖ history?! Even if you guys are not fighting but having ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— for seven days and seven nights, I don’t give a damn, I only care about what to do with my broken divine weapon…!

What to do!!

What to do!!!

It’s important so I have to say it three times!!

Perhaps he saw through my dissatisfaction, the great ancestor sneered and said, “Ignorant brat, listen here. Even though this divine weapon is broken, it is still essentially a divine weapon. It contained a divine law within its blade.”

“D- divine Law…?” The same level as the law that retarded goddess cast on me? The one that would strike me with lightning when I ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— my ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—, or when I say words like ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— ⓑⓔⓔⓟ—?

When I thought about it that way, it wasn’t that bad? I just didn’t know what kind of law it was.

“That’s right, this sword has a law that ignores any defense. Although it has broken and lost its effectiveness on entities above the level of God, it should still work on those below the ranks of deities. No matter how thick is their skin or what kind of magic they used to defend, you can still easily stab them with this broken sword. If I remember correctly, there shouldn’t be any God in this world. That is to say, nobody can stop your attack!”

I- is this sword really that awesome?

Wait a minute, something sounds fishy…

The huge body of the dragons surfaced in my mind, then I looked at the 5-centimeter sword again.

“Nobody can defend against my attack, but what happens if I stab them with my sword?”

“What did you say?”

“In other words, are there any aftereffects? Such as certain kill, or maybe a lethal poison coated on the sword blade, etc.?”

“Hmph!” The great ancestor sneered again, “With my power, why do I need additional effects on my sword? You should know that when this sword was still two hundred meters long, anyone I stabbed would be dead. Even that old nemesis I previously told you about, he also didn’t dare to let me deliver a clean blow to his body.”

You still remembered it was two hundred meters?! Who in their right mind would let you stab them with a two hundred meters sword! More importantly, why are there only five centimeters left of the two hundred meters sword? You tell me where did that 199.95 meters go to!

I looked at the five-centimeter broken sword in my hand with dry tears, thinking that I still got scammed by the great ancestor in the end…

“It’s only five centimeters long, I bet it couldn’t even kill a human that’s slightly on the chubby side,” I accidentally let slip my true thoughts.

“If thou thrust the sword hilt into their body as well, I can guarantee no humans would remain alive.”

It would be stranger if that’s possible! Why don’t you demonstrate it to me?

Perhaps the great ancestor also felt that was unreasonable, he coughed dryly twice, “In any case, it is fortunate that this sword is still a divine weapon, it has a self-repair function. As long as thou can find the other broken pieces of blades, it can still restore to its former glory.”

Even at its former glory, it only relies on its length to stab the others to death right?

But that’s still better than nothing. Two hundred meters is still much better than 5 centimeters. At least the gift from great ancestor wouldn’t go to waste.

“Where can I find the fragments?”

After pondering for a bit, the great ancestor said confidently, “It is definitely in this world.”

That’s the same as not answering! Can’t you be a little more reliable as the elder?

“How can I find it with no specific location?”

“Don’t worry,” the great ancestor had an expression that says just leave everything to me and I will give you a favorable answer: “Even if you try to find it randomly, there is surely a probability of finding a few fragments. After all, it had been shattered into hundreds of pieces.”

I knew it wouldn’t be that easy.

I knew from the beginning that you were just a fraudster!

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The ⓕⓤⓒⓚ with mutation?!

Why does a lofty creature from a fantasy world like you know about such a scientific term and looks to be very knowledgeable about the topic to boot? You’re spoiling my image of the fantasy world y’know?

But the great ancestor said he had been to many worlds. It’s not impossible if he managed to learn a few specialized terms like that to impress the ladies in a modern world.

“I had once stayed for several years in a world with different systems from ours. Moreover, I received a Ph.D. in Biology while I was there, so I have a little expertise in that field,” said the great ancestor indifferently, but it sounded like he was boasting no matter how I hear it.

What do you mean by little?! It was a Ph.D. man! Why did you go and learn about biology when you are already an existence that stands above the gods? Moreover, to get a Ph.D. in merely a few years! Are those fools who only learned how to roast meat in two hundred years really your direct descendant?

“Thinking back, those female doctor life forms are indeed excellent,” the great ancestor smacked his lips as he immersed in his memories.

So he really did that to impress the ladies… and they were the legendary female doctor of science at that!

Even that dragon who dared to kidnap the Demon King’s daughter couldn’t be compared to you.

No… now’s not the time to make a retort. If the great ancestor is right, then I’m really going to be a flat board for life…

I am done for.

There’s no more hope for me…

There goes my revenge…

Who am I kidding, there’s no way I can get my revenge when I’m just a stranded salted fish.

No… the flat-chested me is even inferior to a salted fish. I’m just dead, rotten fish.

I fell onto my knees and slammed the ground with both hands. Although I couldn’t see my face, I was sure my eyes looked as lifeless as the dead fish’s.

At this very moment, the chain of events formed in my brain was as follow:

No big breasts mean I will not obtain the strongest power, no power means I won’t be able to complete my revenge. No revenge means I won’t be able to take back what is mine. If I can’t take back what is mine, I am only a loser who can only ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— my ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— in my head.

In this lifetime, I can be nothing more than a scum who eats and play around until death. And after I take over the throne, I will be an incapable ruler who abuses my power to start a harem.

Wait, that doesn’t… sound so bad?

“My descendant, will thou give up just like this?” The great ancestor’s dignified voice carried an indescribable force.

“I understand how lamentable it is for a female to not have breasts,” the great ancestor had a compassionate face.

I also understand that you are a very nice gentleman under that thick skin.

“But that isn’t the only way to obtain the strongest power.”

“There are still other methods?”

“That’s right, as thou once said, big breasts are the strongest power in this world. Those are mutually related. Since thou can’t obtain the strongest power through big breasts, then thou shall obtain big breasts through the strongest power.”¹

That… sounds reasonable…

“How can I obtain it?”

“All living creatures can reconstruct their body one time when they make a breakthrough into the realm of gods. According to my memory, there was once a flat-chested goddess who became big-breasted after ascending to godhood.”²

The golden light in the surroundings suddenly condensed and formed a familiar figure.

I- isn’t she one of the two retarded goddesses who turned me into this state?

Her perfect figures momentarily flashed through my head…

“In other words, her breasts are fake? She was actually a flat board?”

The great ancestor shook his massive head and said, “After the reconstruction, they become the real thing. But I remember she was wearing breast pads regularly before ascending to godhood.”

W- wearing breast pads? There was such a thing? In regards to that, I could only…

Hahahahahahahahahahaha! Bwahahahahahahahaha! Oh my god, Puhahahahahahahaha!

—————— Meanwhile ——————

Somewhere in the void between worlds.

“A——Achoo~”

“Big sis, what’s wrong?”

The goddess rubbed her nose, and said, “For some reason, my nose feels very itchy. I wonder if someone is talking about me…”

The little sister embraced the older sister from behind, then she groped her breasts and said, “Of course many people would talk about big sis. Especially when you have such big breasts.”

The older sister slapped the younger sister’s hand away and said with slight anger, “Other people don’t know, but how can you not? Aren’t you just trying to mock big sister?”

“Hehe, big sis looks cute even while angry~”

——————Back to present——————

Wheeze… wheeze… that was too funny! The goddess was wearing breast pads before, and her current breasts are actually revamped…

Is this actually any different from breast enlargement surgery?

“How about it, are thou willing to take this path?”

“I’m willing,” but in order to obtain the greatest power, I can even tolerate a breast enlargement surgery.

“Very well,” A black spherical object suddenly appeared before me, “This is a weapon I used in my early years, take it.”

As expected of the great ancestor, so generous with his properties.

“Stretch your hand in there.”

I followed the great ancestor’s instruction and stretched my hand into the spherical object. My hand touched upon a cool, rod-like object. This is… a sword hilt?

Of course, only a cool weapon like swords can match up with me…

Alright, come on out, lemme see the greatest divine weapon of all times.

As I pulled my hand out, the gorgeous sword hilt gradually showed itself. The sword blade also gave off a beautiful resonating sound.

“B- Bzzt.”

“……”

You guys didn’t misread, nor did I use the wrong expression. That was not a dash that represents a drawn-out sound effect, but a period that represents immediate termination.

That was because…

I slowly lifted the sword in my hand, the blade was broken and it was only five centimeters long. My retorting spirit was endlessly igniting.

The one thing I wanted to say most now was…
You ⓑⓔⓔⓟ ⓑⓔⓔⓟ— is really an old scammer!

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