“Why can’t you go out with me?”
“Well… why…? Have you ever considered our genders?”
“Both female, right?”
“So you do know what you’re saying…”

My head started to ache. Apparently, Yarai-san didn’t have much of a sense of social norms.

“Are you the type to care about that kind of thing, Kaidou-san?”
“Not really. These days, I think it’s ridiculous to make a fuss over same-sex relationships. But, well… being the one involved makes it a different story.”
“This would be a same-sex relationship, huh. I see now.”
“You’re only realizing that now…”
“I don’t really understand what ‘liking’ even means.”

Was she a twisted shojo manga protagonist? The type who falls for a melancholy, new male teacher. Though in Yarai-san’s case, it was probably genuine lack of understanding—she seemed to live entirely by passion.

“Anyway, I’ve got to think about appearances. And it’s not exactly easy for me to just break up with Shouya.”
“Oh, really? I thought it’d be like, ‘Let’s break up—okay, done!’”
“I’m not a kindergartener.”

If it were that simple, I wouldn’t even have been dating him in the first place.

“Then… if you don’t like him, why did you end up dating him at all?”
“Honestly… it just… happened?”
“Huh?”

Yarai-san tilted her head, clearly not following my vague explanation. And it wasn’t like I could explain it properly either—hence this half-hearted answer.

“I honestly don’t know. One day, everyone just seemed to expect it. I tried to ignore it, but then Shouya confessed to me.”
“And you couldn’t exactly say no.”
“Yeah… something like that.”
“Kaidou-san, that’s kind of sad, isn’t it?”
“Huh… well, I guess. Maybe.”

Sad, huh. Apparently, I’d been put in a situation that could inspire pity. At least, that was what people thought. I hadn’t really realized it myself.

I’d half-accepted it, thinking that’s just how things were. Sure, it had been a bit uncomfortable, but it wasn’t exactly painful either.

“It’s sad, you know. You’re in a relationship. You should at least get to choose who you kiss, right?”
“That’s not something I want to hear from you…”

Seriously? That came from the person who forcibly stole my first kiss? Talk about taking yourself off the hook.

Yarai-san nodded at my remark. Like nodding can fix it.

“Anyway… Kaidou-san, are you okay with how things are right now?”
“I’m fine. That’s why I’ve been leaving things as they are.”
“But… after that kiss the other day, things aren’t tense with your boyfriend, are they?”
“Tense? Not exactly… I guess we just talk less now.”

Not that we’d been all lovey-dovey up until now.

We hadn’t even kissed—our relationship had been clean and proper. Probably frustrating for him as a guy, but that was non-negotiable for me.

Of course, I never expected to end up kissing another girl.

“Then… maybe you should just break up!”
“…It’s not that simple.”
“Why? You think there’s no point in being with him, right?”
“That’s how I feel. But others don’t see it that way.”

Me and Shouya—the flashy, attractive couple. Being around us made everyone feel like part of that spotlight. To them, I was nothing more than decoration.

“Other people… your feelings don’t matter at all? Even though it’s your life?”
“That’s how it is. Once you’re part of a group, you just have to go with the flow.”
“…I guess I’ll never understand.”
“That figures.”

I realized I sounded a little sarcastic. Great. I was just taking my frustration out, being mean to someone who genuinely cared about me.

“Anyway, I can’t go out with you, Yarai-san. Even without considering my situation in class, it’s impossible.”
“Then… does that mean I don’t have to kiss you anymore?”
“Have to? You’re the one forcing it… Why does it sound like I’m the one asking for it?”

Yarai-san seemed to interpret everything in whatever way suited her. Optimistic, or maybe just thoughtless—good or bad, she didn’t seem to worry much.

“You can say that now, but it won’t last!”

She puffed up her chest unnecessarily, trying to look imposing. And wow… it really was big.