[Backstage, Witch’s Workshop Booth]

I was in the middle of the biggest crisis I’d ever faced.

“Come on now, no more secrets. Spill everything before things get ugly.”

“Don’t question me! I’ll never give in to violence!”

I was tied to a plastic chair, hands bound behind the backrest. I couldn’t stand, couldn’t move—completely at her mercy. All I could do was glare at her in defiance.

…Though I doubt it had any real effect.

Standing before me, foot up on a stool, was Lei Meow Meow—showing no regard for modesty with safety shorts under her skirt. Her expression was fierce, eyes full of fire. She looked like a legendary yasha straight out of folklore.

A female yasha, too.

(Probably something like this pose.)

“Oh-ho?”

“What are you—mmph!”

She’d somehow found an old-school tungsten desk lamp and suddenly shone it in my face. The warm yellow light hit me with a flash, stinging my eyes.

“What am I doing? Nothing serious. Here, have an apple.”

She held out a bright red apple with a delicate hand… then crushed it in one go—pop!—right in front of me, splattering juice all over my face.

Tart. Very tart.

What the hell kind of grip strength was that?

Was she trying to say that if I didn’t cooperate, I’d end up like that apple?

“You know I’ve got a temper,” Lei Meow Meow said. “If you don’t talk, who knows what kind of accidents might happen.”

Knowing Tian Xi might be a bit soft-hearted, she’d smartly posted her outside to keep her from interfering. From where I sat, I could see the bob-cut girl pouting with her eyes downcast, staring gloomily at the floor—my angel No.2... looked like she was actually mad this time.

She noticed me staring, hesitated, then shot me a glare and stepped out the door.

Guess I’ll need to apologize like my life depends on it.

After sweeping up the mess of apple bits, Lei Meow Meow returned to resume the “interrogation.”

But I jumped in before she could speak.

“Ahem… so, the blessings of the God of Bishoujo come in different types. What Miyanaga Kohime has is a trial version—like what Uncle Lei Luo got before. It’s temporary, and the effect will wear off tonight. But yours and Sis Xi blessings are permanent.”

“Yeah, nice try. But she said you’ll turn her back, not to wait for the effect to wear off tonight. You think I wouldn’t catch the difference?”

Whoa. The brute has brain cells?

“I didn’t explain the whole Church of Bishoujo thing to her. She must have misunderstood the technicalities!”

“Oh-ho?”

“Besides! Remember when we were at the bar? I asked if you’d go back if you had the chance, and what did you say? You told me you were saying goodbye to your old self, right?”

Her ruby-red eyes blinked as she recalled the moment. Then, sheepishly, she nodded.

“It’s a bit abstract, but from that moment on, the possibility of going back was already gone.”

“So what you’re saying is, once someone truly accepts their new identity, there’s no going back?”

After all, she's one of my quotas. Not that I’d ever tell them that.

“More or less, yeah.”

Once someone genuinely embraces their identity as a girl, there's really no reason—or way—to turn back.

Same goes for Meow Meow. If she did go back, she’d have to give up being an idol. No way she’d want that now.

“You swear you’re not lying?”

“When have I ever lied to you?”

“How many times haven’t you?! Come on, list your crimes!”

…Yeah, I walked right into that one.

Here I thought I was an honest guy, but looking back, I’ve basically been lying nonstop for days.

“Like you could even count them all!”

“Oh? So you do know!”

Meow Meow’s scoff dripped with sarcasm, practically vibrating out of her nostrils.

Then she leaned in close, lowering her voice so Tian Xi wouldn’t hear from the hall.

“Can Xiao Xi still turn back?”

“She can… but would it really be better for her?”

That made Meow Meow hesitate, her expression twisting in a clear internal struggle.

What, she’s conflicted too?

Sure, Tian Xi says she wants to turn back, but come on—gorgeous, gentle girl vs. mohawked chubby guy? No contest. Of course Meow Meow’s conflicted.

“And is she really that desperate to go back?” I nudged. “She even started reading girl-oriented romance novels, way more femme than you ever were.”

“But still… we should respect her wishes…”

Seeing her waver more, I decided to push.

“And besides, you’re always calling me a pervert. But if she turns back into a guy, wouldn’t she be a perv too? You were once a guy also, right? You should understand how male minds work best.”

That got a visible shiver out of her, probably reminding her of something.

Judging from the flicker in her eyes, I think she just recalled a shirtless, drunk, mohawked Tian Xi puckering up at her.

Wait—how do I even know it looked that specific?

“I guess there’s no choice.” She let out a dramatic sigh and practically shouted: “So what you’re saying is—neither Xiao Xi nor I can turn back now!!”

I blinked, realizing that wasn’t for me. She’d raised her voice on purpose.

Sure enough, Tian Xi burst through the door, looking somewhere between devastated and relieved. Behind her was Mai-chan, who’d apparently been standing just outside. She shot me an apologetic glance.

She didn’t know the full story, but it was obvious I was tied up because of something she’d said earlier.

“What do you mean, we can’t turn back?!”

“Ahem, well, here’s how it is…”

I gave Mai-chan the rundown of the Church of Bishoujo—yes, again—and she gave me a look of disbelief.

“That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. Sounds like some trashy third-rate web novel plot.”

“Hey! It is a third-rate plot, but you don’t have to be that mean about it!”

“I’m not stuck like this too, am I?”

“No, no. You’ll automatically go back at midnight. Don’t worry.”

Good, I just hope Cangyu doesn’t spill anything else to her later…

“It’s fine, Xiao Xi, even if you can’t turn back, you’ll always be my adorable little sis. I’ll take good care of you.”

Tian Xi sat blankly on the stool that had just been used to intimidate me, while Meow Meow kept patting her head with all the tenderness in the world.

Of course, this so-called “big sis” didn’t say a single word about the fact that “little sis” might still be able to change back.

“Big bro, you’re amazing!”

Tian Xi looked touched and hugged Meow Meow from behind.

“I knew following you was the right choice!”

You totally chose the wrong person to follow!

From where I was sitting, I could see Lei Meow-meow’s evil little smirk—pure "just as planned" energy.

I was ready to confess everything, but she dragged me back into the lie. If I end up in hell, may I be spared the tongue-cutting part… Actually, wait, I’m a god (apprentice) now. What am I afraid of hell for?

Bring it on, baby. Let’s enjoy this hell together.

Still… seeing the pitiful look in Tian Xi’s eyes made my chest tighten.

“I’m really sorry, Sis Xi. But I swear you’ll definitely be able to find happiness!”

If I weren’t tied up, I’d be groveling on the floor by now. Even that wouldn’t be enough to earn forgiveness.

“It’s fine. I mean, I guess I don’t mind being stuck this way.”

…Huh? Did she just accept it?

Just as things were finally winding down, a fox-like head poked through the curtain.

“Well, well, there you are.”

It was Wu Qinglan. This was his booth, but he was sneaking around like a thief.

“Hey, the crowd’s getting bigger out there. And young man you’re just back here slacking off?”

I wobbled the chair helplessly. “Does this look like slacking off to you? I’m tied up.”

Meow Meow gasped, finally remembering to untie me—only to be greeted by Wu Qinglan’s mischievous grin.

“Kinky. So you two are into that kind of thing, huh? Am I interrupting?”

“What?! Me and him?!”

Lei Meow Meow was so mad she started laughing. Bright, sunny laughter… like the kind a goddess of death might make before she cuts your soul in half.

“For the sake of both of our lives and safety,” I cut in, “please stop talking. See that apple over there? She crushed it. With her bare hands.”

Wu Qinglan looked at the apple bits, then touched her own skull as if calculating the risk.

He immediately shifted to a serious business face.

“Miss Lei Meow Meow, since our stage is free right now… how about hopping up for a song and doing a bit of your promo?”