In the end, I still got clobbered by Lei Meow Meow’s signature Thunder God Meow Meow Fist.

She probably held back a little—wouldn't want to ruin the carefully crafted prop gauntlet—but I still flew nearly five meters and landed flat on my back at the stage exit. The world spun, my vision tripled, and I could barely move.

This girl… was she developing a habit of punching me?

Not long after, the red and pink magical girls stepped out from backstage, the red one was Scarlet-chan, and the pink one was Tian Xi.

From where I was lying, sprawled out on the ground, I had a clear view of Scarlet-chan’s black safety shorts... and Tian Xi’s white... bear? Or squirrel?

Scarlet-chan glanced down at me, raised an eyebrow in quiet contempt, and walked off.

Great. What a way to make a first impression.

Tian Xi came out behind her, sighing as she twisted the ends of her pink wig.

“I still don’t get why I had to be the pink magical girl. Isn’t it a bit too... sugary sweet? I mean, isn’t it a little too suggestive?”

With the wig on, she did look softer—almost dainty. It wasn’t just panties or shorts—her whole outfit seemed more revealing than the others'. From this angle, I could just barely make out her light pink bra beneath the top.

I looked away quickly, cheeks flushed.

The mix of innocence and low-key sex appeal actually matched the character from the manga perfectly.

“Don’t worry! even you, Sis Xi, can totally be cute!” I gave her a thumbs-up from the floor, face still half-tilted.

“I don’t want to be cute! Wait—little Chang Kai?! Why are you even lying there—wait, gahh!”

Realizing the angle I’d just seen her from, Tian Xi turned bright red, clutched her skirt, and hurried off.

Next came Rinka, dragging her makeup case and sucking on a lollipop—probably one Scarlet-chan had given her.

Compared to Tian Xi, who had zero awareness, Rinka was a seasoned crossdresser. The moment she noticed me, she smoothly adjusted her skirt and posture, only letting her tights-clad legs stay visible. (A proper crossdresser knows to never reveal suspicious bulges.)

“Oh come on, Kai-chan. I turn around for one second and you’re already on the floor peeping at girls?”

“Don’t make it sound like I’m some perv! I got smashed! Help me up, I can’t move.”

“You can’t? That’s great. Should I do your makeup while you’re down?”

“Please don’t joke about that. I’m not crossdressing!”

The fear of the idea alone forced me to spring back up on my feet.

And with that, our five magical girls were assembled—Red, Yellow, Blue, Pink, and Black.

Unlike most magical girl shows, Magical Girl Paradise had a twist: the girls weren’t school kids but soldiers—part of a special forces unit tasked with defending the world from monstrous threats that appeared without warning.

The five protagonists all belong to the same unit: E-Squad, or as some would call them, Eel-Squad.

But don’t be fooled—the “E” in E-Squad doesn’t stand for eel, or elite, or even eternity.

It just stands for END.

As in, if you get assigned to E-Squad, you're basically doomed. In every sense of the word. It’s where they dump all the screw-ups and underperformers.

And on the brutal front lines, a squad like that has a sky-high mortality rate.

Because of their military status, the magical girls all wear standardized uniforms—same design, different colors.

In fact, Miss Marika even incorporated elements of military uniform into her costume designs, giving the otherwise floaty outfits a touch of cool, disciplined edge.

Each character had their own spin, of course. For example...

“Wait—why am I the only one without a ribbon on my chest?! And why is my neckline so low?!”

Miss Marika gave a sheepish smile. “Sorry, Xiao Xi. Your character’s the fanservice type. You know how there’s always one who’s extra sexy, right?”

“Her skirt’s five centimeters shorter than ours,” Scarlet-chan added helpfully, licking a new lollipop with practiced ease.

Even now, she still had bandages wrapped around one hand—though her current character didn’t have that setting.

“Can’t we switch roles?” Tian Xi asked, clearly hoping for a last-minute reprieve.

Miss Marika patted her shoulder sympathetically. “You’ve got the best figure out of everyone. You’re perfect for this role. I’m counting on you.”

I mean, this is the same girl who once wore a full-body swimsuit for a pageant. Some cleavage shouldn’t be a problem.

Lei Meow Meow handed her a new copy of Magical Girl Paradise.

“Since you’re here anyway, might as well treat it as work,” she said with a smirk, echoing Tian Xi’s own line from earlier.

"Why not take a look at the manga? Get to know the character you're cosplaying—you might see her in a new light."
Then she added casually,
"Oh, by the way, the magical girl I play is the first one to die."

Is... is spoiling things some kind of contagious disease?

Oh the Great God of Spoilers—please come smite this violent woman who just can't keep her mouth shut!

I see…so in this crazy world... the God of Bishoujo is the one true deity...

Miss Marika brought out some plastic stools for everyone. Spotting Xiao Yao reading quietly in the corner, she brought one over and sat beside her.

“So, what did you think of the manga?” she asked, tentative but curious.

As the lead artist, she clearly cared about the response.

Xiao Yao brushed her side bangs out of her eyes. “The action is sharp, and the fight choreography’s great. The character designs are strong. But the backgrounds? Way too sparse. It’s mostly speed lines and vanishing points. The artist struggles with scenery.”

“Ah… that might be the case. But normally do people start their critique from the art standpoint?”

“As for the story, that’s more subjective. Personally, I don’t mind darker plots or characters dying. But I wouldn’t say I like it either. Some readers will enjoy it, others won’t.”

She sure is straight with words, couldn’t she compliment it a bit more?

Outside the glass walls, the crowd at the entrance was swelling. It wasn’t even 10 a.m. yet, and it was already pushing 38°C. Packed shoulder to shoulder like that, it must’ve been even worse out there.

We were lucky to be let in early.

“Yo, seems like y'all are changed and set? ” Wu Qinglan finally returned, with Crow pushing a cart full of drinks behind him.

“We grabbed some drinks and pre-ordered lunch bentos while we were out.”

He passed out the drinks to everyone, then clapped his hands.

“Alright, all you adorable magical girls, listen up! You’ve got three missions today.”

He pointed to the stage.

“First: cosplay performances. That includes posing for photos and recreating scenes from the manga—on stage or around the floor. You all look amazing, so just showing up is great promo.”

Then he gestured toward the booth’s checkout area.

“Second: booth work. Don’t worry about running the register—someone else has that covered. Just help pack up merch and hand over bags. Marika’s got a signing later, so she’s off the hook for this one.”

Finally, he held up a stack of flyers.

“Third: feel free to wander around when you’re free! You don’t need to push flyers into people’s faces—your costumes already draw attention. If someone shows interest in your character, then give them one and invite them to the booth.”

Tian Xi raised her hand. “Can we use the stage during downtime?”

“Planning to promote your idol activities?” he asked. “Young man mentioned it earlier. Sure—go for it. I think it’s a great idea.”

“Thank you so much! That’s a huge help!”

Although Lei Meow Meow wasn’t fond of Wu Qinglan’s frivolous personality, her manager, Tian Xi, was diligently securing promotional opportunities for her. Reluctantly, she turned her face away and muttered.

“…Thanks.”

So soft it was barely audible.