“Hey, hey! Doesn’t this totally blow my cover? Why’d you have to mention Biyang Girls Academy just now?”

Since it was almost the designated meeting time at noon, after saying a quick goodbye to Lei Meow Meow’s family, Rinka and I paddled towards the dock, ready to leave.

Facing away from the bow, he turned his head slightly to check the direction. Hearing my question, he glanced at me out of the corner of his eye and casually replied, “What, you wanted me to say the boys school instead? You’d be dead even faster.”

“Well, I mean, when you put it like that…”

“Hmph. And yet, you always say, ‘I, Chang Kai, would rather die than crossdress.’ So what happened? You took advantage of your androgynous looks to fake as a girl, fool people, play with their feelings… and turns out, you’ve even got together with an idol?”

Rinka’s sharp tongue could really cut deep… Honestly, he was way cuter when he was in his angelic girl mode.

“Ahem, this is just another persona, okay?”

It’s not like I wanted to be seen as a girl—it just ended up that way!

Now that I think about it, confessing my real gender to them wouldn’t be a big deal. Other than getting hugged a few times by Tian Xi, I hadn’t really done anything that outrageous. Worst case? I’d just get beaten up by Lei Meow Meow again.

“Just trust me. As long as you use Biyang Girls School as your cover, there won’t be any issues. When the new semester starts and they come looking for you, I can handle your student records. You might even get to meet them in person—of course, you’ll have to be in girl mode. Believe in me.”

Wow. Gotta respect the confidence of a rich kid who hid a secret base in the school building. Wait, don’t tell me his family owns shares in the school?

At the dock, Bei Qiaojue and her little angels were nowhere to be seen. Judging by the time, they probably didn’t get a turn and just headed back to the meeting point.

A staff member used a hook to pull in our rubber boat and assist with docking. The boat inflated with air bounced off the concrete pier a few times before settling down.

Technically, the raft dock was part of the artificial beach, so running back to the meeting point wouldn’t take long—not to mention, it’d help with digestion.

A BBQ feast! Grilled meat! Charcoal fire! Oh, this is gonna be amazing!

Sure, I might be a total coward herbivore when it comes to relationships, but when it comes to food? I’m a hardcore carnivore.

If a god of grilled meat exists, I’d definitely be the most devoted follower.

“Speaking of which, Rinka, you still owe me a barbecue meal, don’t you?”

“Wow, Kai, are you really that much of a freeloader?”

“What do you mean? You promised me, remember?”

Back at the meeting point, the trio of Haitang, Tangerine, and Yang Qi had already returned. Tangerine was sprawled on a lounge chair while Yang Qi, who had somehow acquired a dry towel, was diligently drying her tail.

As the self-proclaimed leader of this whole event, Haitang stood with her arms crossed under the shade of an umbrella, looking thoroughly annoyed.

When she saw Rinka and me return, she glanced at the waterproof bag holding my phone. One eyebrow shot up higher than the other, forming a crooked expression.

“Twelve sharp. You two really cut it close, huh? Now we’re just waiting on Zhao Zhao and Bei Qiaojue.”

“I wouldn’t worry too much about Zhao Zhao, but Bei Qiaojue hasn’t come back yet? We ran into her around eleven-thirty over at the raft dock. She had two girls with her.”

“…Two girls?”
Haitang immediately facepalmed.
“She reeled in some girls? I knew it. Don’t even bother waiting for her—she’s probably having lunch with them right now.”

Judging by her reaction, this wasn’t the first time something like this had happened. So, Bei Qiaojue was actually a player—a female casanova, huh?

“What about Zhao Zhao? Did you call him?”

“Yeah, he said he’s on his way.”

Tangerine suddenly ran up to me, hands behind her back, her wet orange hair sticking to her back. I stared at her, a little confused. She stared back, big-eyed and silent. Just when I thought we were about to enter a ‘What are you looking at?’ ‘What are you looking at?’ loop, she suddenly broke into a wide grin and grabbed my wrist.

“Onii-chan! From now on, I’m sticking to you like glue!”

Her hands were soft, like a cat’s paw pads.

Her swimsuit was a relatively modest one, but the sudden closeness still made my heart race a little.

Wait… what kind of cat was Tangerine originally? I remember she was chubby, but I can’t recall what she actually looked like…

“Commander, I’m lending you Tangerine for the afternoon, so you’d better be grateful for my generosity.”

“What are you talking about? she was always my little sister!”

“Sorry, but legally, she’s mine now.”

“But she definitely loves me more!”

“Not necessarily. I mean, I cuddle with her every night, so our sisterly bond is much stronger.”

To prove her point, she hugged Tangerine and playfully rubbed her head against her.

“Damn it! I wanna cuddle Tangerine in bed too!”

“Then I’m calling the cops.”

“Enough!”
Tangerine suddenly cut in, wrapping her other arm around Haitang’s.
“Don’t fight over me—Both of you are my wings~”

I froze for a moment, but Haitang just flicked her forehead. “Stop copying Bei Qiaojue. That girl is a terrible influence.”

Just then, Zhao Zhao finally showed up. He was hard to miss, given his size, even from a distance, he could be seen sprinting toward us, trailing a cloud of fine sand in his wake.

“Five minutes late. That’s a serious offense,” Haitang declared, a smug grin on her face. “For lunch, you’re only allowed to eat vegetables, Zhao Zhao.”

“WHAT?! BBQ with no meat? Are you the devil?!”

Haitang, Zhao Zhao, and I were all hardcore carnivores.

To my surprise, this indoor water park actually had a BBQ area—inside a cave-like structure near the outer wall. The cave’s ceiling also happened to be the starting point for the lazy river ride.

Since the whole thing was disguised as a rock formation, the interior had a natural cave aesthetic, with stalactites hanging down—which, as it turned out, were actually hidden ventilation pipes for the BBQ smoke.

Our group of nine got two large grills. Haitang placed the order, and before long, a server arrived, pushing a cart loaded with meat.

Of course, there were some veggies too—someone had to look out for Zhao Zhao, after all.

Most of us grilled our own portions, but Haitang, true to her chaotic-evil nature, lived up to her reputation as the ‘Gian of the urban village’ by occasionally snatching other people’s food.

Meanwhile, Xiao Cangyu had it easy—Brother Feng Wu not only grilled her meat for her but even cooled it down before feeding it to her. She just sat there playing on her handheld console, mouth open whenever it was time to eat.

Damn it, why don’t I have a doting older sister to take care of me?

As if she read my mind, Tangerine trotted over with a plate, offering me what looked like grilled fish.

“Onii-chan~ Aah~”

She even opened her mouth, as if to demonstrate how I should eat it.

Having a little sister who’s this affectionate isn’t bad either, except…

“Tangerine, I appreciate it, but this fish is burnt to a crisp.”

She pouted, looking dissatisfied, then took a bite herself… and immediately chugged orange juice.

“My fish!!”

That’s not a fish anymore! I snatched the once-mackerel-now-charcoal stick from her hands and tossed it into the trash.

"Let Kai-ge show you how it’s really done—this is how you grill a fish properly."

Oil.
A sprinkle of salt and pepper.
A rhythmic flip.

Ching-ching-ching! Ching! Ching-ching!

Behold! A perfectly golden grilled mackerel.

"Try it?" I brushed on some sauce and handed it to her.

"So good! Onii-chan, you're awesome!"

Meanwhile, I noticed Zhao Zhao holding a grilled corn cob in his mouth, staring dryly at the various meats sizzling on the grill. Somehow, an image of poor Xiao Lei looking all sad and meatless popped into my head, and I felt a pang of sympathy.

So, while grilling earlier, I made an extra fish just in case.

Glancing over at Haitang, she was chatting with Rinka at another grill. No idea how those two ended up talking.

"Here, eat this quick while Haitang isn’t looking."

"C-Commander…"

I passed the fish to Zhao Zhao, but instead of being moved, his expression stiffened.

"There’s a demon behind you."

Haitang had somehow teleported right behind me. Are you secretly Sakuya Izayoi? Can you actually stop time?

"Oh my, who exactly were you trying to sneak past?"

…Tch, it’s impossible to let your guard down around this woman.

And so, one thing led to another, and now I was stuck manning the grill for everyone.

The golden mackerel I had given Zhao Zhao? Snatched by Haitang. Turns out she loved my cooking, and as a “reward” for allowing Zhao Zhao to eat meat, she made me take full responsibility for one of the grills.

Then, everyone else realized I was pretty damn good at grilling. One by one, they all succumbed to laziness and stopped cooking for themselves. If they wanted something, they just dumped the ingredients on my station, knowing I’d take care of it. Before I knew it, even the other grill was abandoned—only brother Feng Wu and Yang Qi occasionally cooked for themselves.

Now, all I could do was watch skewers and juicy cuts of meat sizzle before my eyes, unable to eat them myself while I carefully tended to the fire. This was worse than just eating vegetables! Was I some roadside skewer vendor now?!

"What’s the problem? The capable do more work! Commander, since you’re such a master at grilling, why not share your blessings with everyone?"

Sharing blessings, huh? So I was now the God of Grilled Meat, spreading the holy gospel of BBQ?

"But I want to eat meat too! Haitang, after all our years of friendship, do you really have the heart to—(Ah, Lao Yan, your beef ribs are ready)—do you really have the heart to do this to me? (Ah, Xiao Cangyu’s chicken wings are done, Brother Feng Wu, come grab them!)"

Haitang blinked her clear eyes and replied matter-of-factly:

"Of course I do."

"You demon! One day, a white-haired man with a giant sword will come to slay you! …Whose chicken hearts? They’re ready."

"Mine! Thanks, Onii-chan!"

"Just tell me whatever else you want, Tangerine~"

"You’re complaining, but I bet you secretly enjoy doing this, don’t you?"

…Okay, maybe I did enjoy feeling needed. But that doesn’t change the fact that watching all this meat cook while I couldn’t eat was pure agony!

The rich aroma of grilled meat assaulted my nose, the sizzling juices dripping onto the hot charcoal, evaporating into wisps of white smoke. All I could do was swallow my own saliva.

Ah, the ocean of my sorrow is vast and endless!

Someone, please play Beethoven’s Pathétique Sonata for me…