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The butler Vance told me where to find a hotel before we rushed away, and the room we got is so well furnished it rivals that of the Gardeland mansion. We had no plans to stay here, but somehow they seemed aware we would be arriving tonight. It’s almost like they had expected all of that to happen.

But I’m already so overwhelmed by everything that happened that I can’t stop to think about that. Olivia’s parents had passed away, and for the longest time believed she had no relatives left, then she regained a family, only to lose it like that.

Why did that have to happen? Why did it have to end like that? Ophelia might have abandoned her family, but Olivia had nothing to do with that. Olivia was devastated when Ophelia passed away. Even if they had their disagreements, they should know the pain of losing a relative. So why did they have to push her away?

I guess it’s also my fault for being an automaton. No matter what I do, I’ll never be a proper human. It’s not just what happened today. There have been countless times that I was made aware of how different I am.

There was the time the adventurers of Bamel noticed, when Mathias referred to me as an inferior product, when an adventurer that mistook me for a murderer called me a monster, and when I was denied rescue for being a magic automaton.

There have been many times I was looked at as a curiosity or with suspicion for being a magic automaton too. But I don’t really care about that, I’ve already accepted that I’m no longer human, it’s not something I can change. I just don’t want to cause Olivia any more trouble.

I’m not human, so I shouldn’t be seen standing next to Olivia. The affection she shows for me will only make her look like she suffers from Pygmalionism¹ to other people. That’s also why I want her to fall in love with someone else, and not a magic automaton like me.

I know that’s not something I can force though, and that’s why I’ve been trying to dodge her advances, hoping that with time her feelings will slowly cool off and she’ll find someone else.

I can’t believe there was a time I really thought I could raise her with her parents gone. I can’t do anything right. I can’t stand myself, always being so useless time and time again.

“Natalia.”

Olivia calls my name, and as I turn up to look at her I feel her hands on my cheeks.

I see Natalia is brooding over something, so I call to her and cup her cheeks.

“Umm…Youngf ‘ady?”

I squish her cheeks as she’s talking, muting her voice a little.

“Are you overthinking stuff again? You had nothing to do with everything that happened today.”
“Bhut-bhut…”

I knew it. I don’t know whether she’s worrying that they found out she was a magic automaton or that my grandfather turned me away, but neither was her fault, and I don’t really care about it.

“Listen, Natalia. That whole party was set up to eliminate any ties I could’ve had with nobles.”
“Hwhat?”

Her voice is filled with confusion. It’s so funny hearing her like this, considering how she’s always acting all serious, that I can’t stop myself from smiling.

“I only noticed a bit ago though. But I mean, think about it, the whole thing was weird. If Uncle Otis really wanted me to become a noble again, he would’ve stepped in to help you or me out, and there’s no way my grandfather didn’t know I’d be there beforehand too.”

I let go and her squished cheeks regain their shape.

“I think Uncle Otis didn’t stop the nobles from making fun of us, and my grandfather said all of those mean things because they didn’t want us to get involved with nobles as a whole.”
“But why would they…”

“It’s true that you can gain a lot of support by being sponsored by a noble, and even the guild gives you a bunch of benefits, but it also comes with a bunch of conditions, and you only get to do the work they want. Even Chris and Mathias back in the Magic Academy warned me about it, saying I shouldn’t give in.”
“I still think that was too harsh though. The retired Marquis really crossed the line with everything he said.”

“If they held back, then other nobles would’ve tried to weasel their way closer to me. And I think my grandfather was also trying to encourage me in a way. If I want to be like my mother and father, I shouldn’t go around mingling with nobles.”
“I see… Are you really sure about this though? That family are the only few surviving relatives you have, they were your family too.”
“No, Natalia. They could’ve become my family, and they decided to help in their own way.”

I think Natalia is thinking back to the time when I lost my parents. It’s true that I was devastated each time I lost one of them, it was horrible. I couldn’t stop crying. But I was able to pull myself back together and stand up again thanks to everyone who was supporting me.

Natalia keeps making light of it, but she was the one who supported me the most when my mother passed away. It’s because of the way she helped me that I have such strong feelings for her.

And now my grandfather and uncle gave me a lesson to not trust someone blindly just because they’re relatives, and to stop me from being manipulated by nobles. That’s why I can smile now. So that Natalia can feel better, and so I don’t waste my relatives’ efforts.

“I’ll be fine. I still have you and everyone else, Natalia.”

In all honesty I’d prefer to have Natalia as my lover and not just family, but I don’t think this is the best time to bring that up.

“All of you are my family now.”

I look around and Clarissa sits on the floor looking at us, while Akane scurries closer to Natalia’s feet. Both of them look concerned.

“Woof…Maid…”
“…”
“You two…”

Ah, Natalia’s voice is a bit different. I guess she’s getting too emotional, or she’s finally letting her defenses down. Clarissa and Akane seem to be more worried about her than me though. I think Natalia was the one hurt the most by that party.

“Cheer up.”
“!”

Clarissa jumps and starts licking Natalia’s cheek, and Akane also climbs up her body to hold her.

“N-no, stop…I…I’m fine…”

There’s something I’ve noticed about her, though I’m sure she’ll deny it if I ask, or maybe she’s not even aware of it. But she’s always been that way. She keeps looking down on herself all the time, saying she’s just a magic automaton, that she’s not a living being, devaluating herself. It’s almost like she believes no one will care no matter what happens to her.

Back when Clarissa was still our enemy, she pushed herself so hard she didn’t wake up for half a year. Then she let the Black Roc take her away. I even heard she did something like that to protect Mir in the forest too.

I don’t think she understands how distressed I was all of those times. She probably doesn’t even understand how Clarissa and Akane feel right now, and even Erika would be worried for Natalia if she was here.

“It’s okay, I’m fine.”

Natalia mutters as she gently pets Clarissa and Akane’s heads. It almost sounds like she’s telling herself that.

“I’ve said this before, but I don’t think of you as a tool or a magic automaton, and if you get like this again I’ll get really angry. And I hate it when you don’t take care of yourself too. I’m glad that you think of me with such importance, but I’ll still get sad if you get hurt because of me.”
“…I’ll be more careful.”
“…Why don’t you just say you won’t do it anymore?”
“I apologize, but I’m still a magic automaton.”

As her master, I have the authority to give her orders that override her will, but I don’t want to use that except when I really have to. So right now I’m not giving her any orders, it’s just a simple request.

“Come back to me, no matter what happens. If you don’t, I’ll hate you Natalia.”

That’s a lie.

I think Natalia always neglects herself because she realizes how the world sees her, but still tries to protect me. I can’t hate her for that, so that won’t happen, no matter what.

I actually like how devoted she is, doing everything in her power for those important to her, ignoring all the pain. But I still want her to take care of herself more.

“Young Lady… Yes, I promise I’ll always come back.”

Saying that, she places her hands on top of mine. I have a feeling she’ll just break this promise again soon. There’s this strong premonition in me telling me that. When I touched her cheeks earlier I could feel her body having a lower temperature than a human, and it feels like our feelings are mismatched like that as well.

Stop that, I can’t think of that now. I decided I’m going to get through this smiling, otherwise I’ll just make Natalia worry more. Let’s just switch topics.

“Oh yeah, there’s this big bed in this room, why don’t we all sleep together in a single bed tonight?”
“Woof woof!”
“!”
“Huh? No, that’s a bit…”

Clarissa and Akane sound excited about it, but as usual, Natalia seems embarrassed.

“But I’m feeling so lonely tonight, I really thought we’d get to enjoy some time together as a family…”
“…I understand, but just for tonight.”
“Yay.”

Natalia slumps her shoulders and sighs loudly. Sorry for using a method like that, but I didn’t lie about feeling lonely.

“Don’t worry, I won’t do anything lewd.”
“Do you realize specifying that will just have the opposite effect?”

After that we change into our bed clothes and the four of us lie down. Me and Natalia go in the middle, with Clarissa on my side, and Akane next to Natalia. I think I’ll be able to sleep really well tonight.

1. Robinxen: Wow that’s a deep lore term.